Forever Alone
Valentine’s Day is the day of romance. You get to be the most romantic person you can be while ignoring the other 364 days of the year (365 days on leap years). But how do single folks celebrate the sacred day of love and spend money on meaningless chocolates?
This is a rhetorical question, by the way. We already know what all the single peeps do on V-Day. It includes a whole lot of wine, a whole lot of ice cream, and some lotion or a showerhead, depending on what you got going on down there. Even this expired gallon of milk has more going for no Valentine’s Day than us lonely folks.